Thursday, February 11, 2010

Walking backwards through life.

So, here's a question for you to contemplate. Are you walking backwards through life? Now, if you know what I'm talking about, or you are trying to turn around, then you're probably not walking backwards in life. If you don't know what I mean, let me expand upon my statement and help you understand.
Recently, my pastor shared a interesting statement that got me thinking. It went something like this... If you spend today worrying about yesterday, you'll end up screwing up your tomorrow. I'm not sure exactly how it went but you get the gist of what he was saying. I thought, "Wow. What a cool statement." It got me thinking and I always love when something gets me thinking...

My thought you ask? "How much time am I actually looking back at the past versus looking where I am?" I realized that I am looking back much more than I thought. I know my life moves forward, that's for sure, but I asked myself, am I really looking ahead? Then it hit me! I am walking backwards through my life. Okay, I understand that you have to look back to the past as a reference point so as not to make the same mistakes again. I know where you're coming from on that point.

It's good to remember your past for several reasons; 1) as a reference for growth and 2) in case it decides to "comes back" and haunt you (which has happened to me more than once). Think of this like you're looking in the rear view mirror as you're driving. You look for a second or two, get your bearings and you make a lane change. However, if you try to drive as you continually look in the mirror, you will eventually... no let me rephrase are destined to crash. Remembering your past and trying to relive or re-experience your past are two different things.

Don't get me wrong I think history is good. I love history. It's nostalgic, warm, fuzzy, and everything is sepia colored. At the same time, I know that history is an interpretation of the past and so it is not true to itself. It is either remembered better or worse than it actually was in most cases. Either way, things never remain the same. Whether we liked it or not, time goes on and things become the past and the past is slightly skewed by our present perspective.

So, what about that old adage "History repeats itself." Good point. Realize, however, that even when history seems to repeat itself, it is still different than it once was, hence, it's new, embodying a whole new batch of current perspectives to go with it. A good example is this current coffee craze where people must have a fresh ground cup of coffee because it's the only way to go. Well, let me inform you, drinking a fresh cup of coffee that has just been ground is not a new idea. It's just the opposite. In fact, it was the only way to have a cup-of-joe in the old days. What is the new part of this repeating history you ask? It's no longer inconvenient to grind the coffee, unlike the old days. The new twist on the old coffee idea is the multiple flavors, strengths, and variations of coffees you can get. People can now get a frap-a-chino, or any specialty drink, at the drop of a coin. So, I would say there are similarities to past history, yes, but the current reality encompasses much, more than the past, hence it is different.

Here's another way to look at the idea of "walking backwards in life." I noticed when I go hiking, and most hikers would probably agree, that the trail you just walked on looks completely different when you look back at where you just came from. Some things definitely look familiar, but as a whole the trail looks different. Has the trail actually changed? No, of course not. It's our perspective of the trail that has changed, and so it looks different, even though it's exactly what it was. Is this getting to deep for you?

Here's a question. Have you ever tried to walk backwards for a long period of time? You're able to go the direction you want, and you are moving forward (for the most part), but you will eventually stumble and/or fall down. When you walk backwards you are unable to get a good look at the terrain you are negotiating. Trying to look over your shoulder when you are facing the wrong direction is, clearly, not the way to walk down a path.It is the same with life. When we try to negotiate our current situation by solely looking back, gazing over our shoulder to see where we are going at present, we are not truly giving the situation all the focus it deserves.

I know many people who are truly walking backwards though life. They gauge every current event on things of the past, some good, some bad. Either way, they are not whole heartedly appreciating the now. Their "current" is always being tainted by the past in some way. They can't seem to just appreciate the present for what it is. Whether it is good or bad, it is right now. The fact-of-the-matter is, sometimes the "right now" is not as good as the past. Sometimes the past was better, than right now and sometimes now is just what it is: a new experience,no better no worse. No matter what it is, realize that in the future it will be remembered differently from a different perspective, and it will change from its original reality. People who are "walking backwards" are continually referencing the past, altering their reality so their now is never what it should, or could be. So they look back to the past again and again, stuck in a vicious loop.

So you're probably asking where is he going with all of this? Well, as much as I like some of my past and think some of it was awesome, (note that I used the words think and was because I know I've skewed it) I hate some of it too. I am not going to let it taint my now. All I really have is right now. The past is gone, and I as much as I hope and plan for a great future, I really only have right now. Here's the kicker. I know if I focus on my now(my current situations in life), my past will correct itself and my future will be a lot more hopeful and promising. Check this out, the now is a new thing of beauty, an adventure to be completely explored and experienced! How about joining the movement of the now? Let go of the past and stop worrying about the future so much. Live your now to the utmost of you abilities. Listen, I'm not telling to sell the farm and go hog-wild. I'm not even saying that the past isn't important. Some things in our past are still effecting are now. The repercussions of past actions sometimes ripple well into our current life. That's a fact. Dealing with those residual things, well, that's what we call being a responsible person. All I'm saying is get into the moment of life and stop waiting for the right moment to start living it.

Coming in a future post are ways in which you can learn to live in the now with passion and responsibility. Also the importance of reality partners, trusting in God, and God's will versus ours. I want everyone to know that God continues to open my eyes wider and wider, the more I ask to see the more he reveals me. Holy, holy, holy Lord! God O mighty, Amen.

When Sable was a little baby she was so fat she couldn't crawl very well, instead she would literally roll to wherever she wanted to go . She would prop herself up like this to get her bearings every once in a while. She was amazingly cute!

This was a water fall sketch I did during "BROTHER BEAR".

A sketchbook page of animals, one of which is chicken little after he was hit over the head by a acorn.

It's a platypus, I thought I would let you know, just incase you're not sure what this is.

A sketchbook watercolor of Ms' B, she was a wonderful cat indeed.

In the spirit of Valentines Day here is a cupid drawing.

I was intrigued by this technique, I don't know why I drew Gorillas, probably because it was around Disney's release of "TARZAN".

Practicing figure drawing without a model, sometimes you win sometimes you lose.


  1. Am I walking backwards? Oh, I don't really want to do any of it over... I love the future.

    What, no dripping earth images? Have you run out???

  2. Wise guy uhn.....why I ought ta....!

  3. That was one hell of an editing job! These train-of thought pieces can take you on a grammar safari.

  4. Thank you Alina, please invite your friends to take a look.

  5. wow I wish i can draw like that. I am trying to draw but I ruin the pictures can I have a few tips to get me going?
    great drawings and I will recommend to friends